famous for its regressive politics

In the third-person bios I provide on those rare occasions when a journal publishes one of my humble stories I say that I live “near Kansas City” (but escape to my Ozark cabin whenever I get the chance).

As you may know if you’ve read this blog long enuf, I grew up in St. Louis, as did my wife, and our four children were born there. I moved my young family to where we are now (30+ years ago) to take a job. When we were looking for a home, our first priority was to get into the best school district. And that’s how we landed on the Kansas side of the state line that Kansas City abuts. (Note: the Kansas City you’ve heard of is probably the one in Missouri, though there is one in Kansas as well, and there’s a North Kansas City that is also in Missouri.) Yes, I live in vanilla suburbia, but it was a fine place to raise children (who have all since escaped to live very different lives). The “problem” is that our home was/is in Kansas, which is famous for its regressive politics. (And spoken by someone who originally comes from Missouri, that’s a serious jibe! Though the recent Blue Wave did make some deep inroads!)

All of this is by way of explaining what is happening in Kansas today. As of April 1, 2019, the grocery stores can now sell “full-strength” beer. Before today, we had to settle for 3.2 percent grocery store beer or carry ourselves to unseemly package liquor stores to get the hard stuff. (And when I first moved here, you could not get an alcoholic drink at a restaurant unless you went to and were a member of dedicated supper clubs that had permits for such debauchery. True story!) You might think that someone who grew up in St. Louis (where Big Bru was a major employer) would be rejoicing at this, but that’s not really the case. And despite the kindly efforts of someone whose name might be something like Yellowstone, I have never developed a taste for craft beers (and I have tried!).

The thing is, I’ve drifted from the true faith and now actually prefer to drink non-alcoholic beer. Sure, I can drink a “full-strength” beer at a restaurant. More than one even. And alcohol-containing beer can sometimes be found in my refrigerator, but given my druthers,* I will supply myself with non-alcoholic beer.

And there’s the rub. For some reason, in the middle of March, all of the grocery stores pulled ALL of the 3.2 beer from their coolers. The shelves were either left empty or they were filled with bottled water. I suppose that was a Puritanical requirement of the law change for some reason, but in that time I could not find my non-alcoholic beer. Certainly the unseemly package liquor stores didn’t carry it. Why would they? I even went across the state line to Missouri to find it, but the grocery stores there didn’t carry it either.

And so the new alcoholic era begins today in Kansas. It remains to be seen whether or not I’ll be able to find my non-alcoholic beer in this embarrassment of riches.

*”druthers” is a curious, regional contraction of “would rather.”

Explore posts in the same categories: Ramblings Off Topic, Rants and ruminations

2 Comments on “famous for its regressive politics”

  1. I have never before been compared to a national park, but I can see how that’s a pretty good comparison!

    I understand that some people don’t like the taste of beer. I understand that some people don’t drink alcohol for any number of totally legitimate reasons. What I fail to understand is why someone might like the taste of beer (as evidenced by drinking NA beer), but does not like craft beers. Perhaps you should try a session lager? (“Session” is the new/old term for cousins of 3:2 beer, which I am familiar with from my Midwestern college days.)

    However, all is forgiven if you manage to get “Big Bru” into common parlance.

  2. markparis Says:

    I am not a beer enthusiast. I’m not fond of the taste of almost all beers, especially IPA’s, which seem to be the beer that most stores carry in great quantity and variety. I usually have a lager in the afternoon with my wife, but I spike it with orange juice to make it more palatable for me (probably not for anyone else, though). Long ago I went camping with some friends in Colorado. We ran out of beer (Oh, no!) on a Sunday, so we went into town. We could only find beer in a grocery store, and they were selling only 3.2 beer. So we bought some. I found it worse than regular beer. But then it was probably one of the cheapest kinds, so not a good sample.

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